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rachel. commented on the post, dissolve 2 weeks, 2 days ago
i feel my brain dissolving.
a gentle fizz at first,
a persistent throbbing as it
splinters into
my organs beginning to fail
while my thoughts
trail into a never-ending plea.whywhywhywhywhywhy?
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rachel. commented on the post, think 3 months, 1 week ago
i wonder what the sun
thinks about the clouds.they share the same sky,
yet some days
the clouds invade its technocolor
blue, leaving the sun
to shimmer weakly.other days, the clouds
are driven into hiding, allowing
the sun to proclaim it’s beauty.however, sometimes i think
maybe the sun
just wants some friends. -
rachel. commented on the post, systems 3 months, 2 weeks ago
my system is so fucked.
i don’t know how to un-fuck it.
i want my system to be normal.
instead it is full of cracks
and holes
and scotch tape.scotch tape doesn’t hold for very long.
i’m waiting for my system to explode
and myself right alongside it. -
rachel. commented on the post, visitor 3 months, 2 weeks ago
knock knock,
the visitor is here.she comes around every
couple of days
hoursminutes
seconds, when she’s persistent.the visitor isn’t someone i particularly care for.
she steals away
all of the life from my
home, she takes
all of my food from the pantry.
she’ll take me
out to the gym, but
she never lets me leave.i wish she’d leave me alone,
but the visitor is at my door,
and i can’t leave her out in the cold. -
rachel. commented on the post, end 4 months ago
“this is the end of my rope.”
you say it with shaking hands,
shaking body,
tremors
dancing in your voice.i glance at you.
back to the floor.
my lines are next:“this is the end
of everything.” -
rachel. posted an update 4 months, 4 weeks ago
there’s a wild wind blowing.
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rachel. commented on the post, season 4 months, 4 weeks ago
in alabama, there aren’t four Seasons, but two. sometimes we get three, but most of the time, we have
1. Blistering Hot
and
2. Just Cold Enough to Freeze Your Nipples but Not Get Snow
i like the second-long in-betweens, myself. those mini-seasons when you lay in the grass, drive around with the windows down, walk everywhere you possibly can so you can find religion for a brief moment before the Seasons find you again. -
rachel. commented on the post, patient 5 months ago
she laid there with a pensive look on her face.
“i am dying.”
white lab coats looked at her with sadness, with horror, with pity, with regret.
the shock of red cascading from her wrists made her hair look dull and lifeless.
a voice came from the doctor to the right of her head.
“yes, my child, you are.”
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rachel. commented on the post, methods 5 months, 1 week ago
there are so many methods i think about;
picture myself
committing them.cutting is messy,
drowning, nearly
impossible.
hanging is too
archaic, and crashing my car
would cost so much money.but i have three half-full bottles of
klonopin,
a few neurontin
and effexor
pills, and running water. -
rachel. commented on the post, mass 7 months, 1 week ago
mass is a tricky word for me.
i suppose i hate my mass, not my weight,
because my weight would change
on every different planet.but my mass, it would always stay the same:
a number never wavering,
a […] -
rachel. commented on the post, suspects 10 months ago
there were many suspects of the crime.
who was the cause?
who was the purpose?
who made this
poor girl
lose her mind?the suspect was never her,
never her.but she was the criminal.
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rachel. commented on the post, railroad 10 months, 2 weeks ago
there are railroad tracks behind my house, abandoned now as my hometown dwindled smaller and smaller. i used to explore the trains back when they were in use. sometimes the cabs would stay there for days, enough […]
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rachel. commented on the post, motion 10 months, 3 weeks ago
the earth is in motion,
spinning around
itself, all while
traveling along it’s track
in the Milky Way.humans could compare themselves
to the earth,
i guess.circling around themselves,
all while […] -
rachel. commented on the post, chills 10 months, 3 weeks ago
i get chills every time you
throw your gaze
to mine. every time
your skin barely
brushes against my skin:i am on fire,
yet the chill bumps
decorating my skin tell
another story. -
rachel. commented on the post, soups 10 months, 3 weeks ago
i like soups. though sometimes, they trigger me.
see, when i didn’t truly eat, i ingested soups. they were low calorie, and made my stomach believe everything was normal.
nothing was normal.
so now, even though […] -
rachel. commented on the post, dwell 10 months, 4 weeks ago
i dwell in the state of my
family, the state that is
the poster child of
racism
sexism
homophobia
hatred.but it is also the state of
family
friendship
late summer nights spent looking at the […] -
rachel. commented on the post, grind 11 months, 2 weeks ago
you know what really grinds my gears?
myself. or more accurately,
this littlefatgirl who has taken over my subconscious,
forever reminding me what i
can never return to.she doesn’t want me to be like […]
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rachel. commented on the post, treaty 11 months, 2 weeks ago
i tried to sign a treaty, months ago. this treaty said, quite plainly, “ms. davis, you will leave this poor boy alone! he doesn’t want you!
forget this.”
i lasted two and a half months.
now, here i am, […]
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rachel. changed their profile picture 1 year, 1 month ago
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rachel. commented on the post, heartache 1 year, 1 month ago
oh, what a familiar word,
cliched but
so so true.for me, it starts as a
hurricane battering away at your sternum,
eyes burning and throat
constantly tight.it continues, like watercolors
it bleeds […] - Load More
