You’re different from him. But you’re kind of the same. Softer, more mild. You’re his shadow. But I’m content with this, I realize, as we sit outside your room, sipping beers, taking drags of our cigarettes. Their butts glowing like fireflies. I wonder what ever happened to the fireflies, that used to coat the sky. Where did they go? I wonder how you accepted me, after I moved from him, to you. But that doesn’t matter much now. I’m here, and you’re next to me. We take turns telling stories. Laughing, smiling. Emptying our glasses, putting out our cigarettes. The world is cooling down quickly. So we stride back inside. Wondering, if I’m back on the same track. Running in circles. Wondering, if maybe you’ll lead me in a new direction. I sprawl out on your bed. Wide smile as you dive over me, pulling my back to your stomach. Your hands are ice on my skin. Dancing their way across my thighs. Flinching, squeaking. Trying to escape your cold. I can’t. So I encase them in mine. Soon their temperatures match. You move your hands under my shirt. The blood begins boiling under my skin. I feel you press harder against me. Eyes slowly shut, sigh. I roll to face you. My hand reaching out to your face. Grazing along the scruff. Noticing the difference between his and yours. Noticing how you seem closer to my age and demeanor than he was to me. Lips press softly to mine, working. Becoming stronger, fierce. Your weight is on top of me, moving to the tempo. Our bodies lost in the other’s. Arms, legs, wrapped together. The end finally comes. My face pressed against your hot chest. Your arms both around me. Legs woven together. Laying in each other’s heat. We lye there for a while. Talking. I crane my neck to look up at you, making me feel like I’m 5; trying to peer up at my father while hugging his leg. I start to run my fingers across your back. Feel your heart beat and breathing slow. Your body loosens. ”That feels so good.” Don’t fall asleep on me. You promise you won’t, but I believe otherwise. Fingers draw near your armpit, and you flinch. I found your Achilles heel. So I attack. You try to ball up, but I’m in the way. Can’t help but smile. I retreat back to your shoulder blades. Now you’re awake, and I continue tracing circles. ”This girl.” I can feel you smiling. Me. You hug me tighter. He would never do this. He would’ve sat a minute or two, then gotten up to get dressed. You only get up to go outside for a pit stop. And come back inside, and rejoin me on your bed. You hand me a white tee, and I slide into it. It’s so soft and light. Amazing how soft guys shirts are. ’It’s new.” I smile. Thank you. I lay back down, and you pull me against you. I continue to draw shapes on your skin, and your eyes slowly shut. You softly run your hand through my hair, rubbing. This is what it feels like to be a puppy I suppose. It feels pretty damn good. I slowly shut down, as do you. In your arms I slip into sleep. Feeling the rise and fall of your chest. The soft murmur of your snores. I’m afraid that when I wake up, you won’t be there. Or maybe you’ll kick me out. Like him. Though the worries aren’t nearly as heavy as my exhaustion. They can wait until morning. And as the morning sun rises, you’re still next to me. Legs half on, half off the bed. Your one arm slung over my back, the other under your head. I watch your eyes dart underneath their lids for a bit. My fingers rubbing the muscles in your arms, tracing them to your back. Alarm clock blares, your eyes shoot open. I reach over and smack it. Morning. ”Mhmmm.” You stretch, muscles waking up. I’m sitting cross legged above you, watching. You pull me back down to your level. ”It’s 6 a.m. Come back to bed.” Amazed. You still want me here. So I slip back down, back against your warmth. Feel your breathing on the back of my neck as I treck back into dreamland. You and him are so alike. And so different. And I’m glad you aren’t him.