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I’m celebrating the end of us. I’m pouring myself a drink-the first one in forever since you hate alcohol-and I did shed my tears, but I’m done now. I want to be done with you. You throw around horrible words aimed to kill and my shield is too weak from taking so many hits.

Posted By Cassie On 09.19.2011 @ 11:57 am

It’s not his concern to worry about what John will think. It isn’t his job. It should be the last thing on his mind as he drops to his knee and offers out the ring box with a smile. He’s already crying, like a sap, like he always does. Once he imagined this another way (a few other ways.) but once it was with John and not the girl he’s proposing to now.

Posted By Cassie On 09.18.2011 @ 4:07 pm

I always knew this could only end one way. We could only ever go out in a blaze of mutually afflicted blaze of glory. You smile with a trail of blood curling down the crook of your mouth and for a second I think maybe I’ve already been hit because I swear I can see my life flashing before my eyes, or maybe it’s just my time with you.

Posted By Cassie On 09.17.2011 @ 4:41 pm

The little pouch of his stomach was warm as he slept. He hated it, the bit of weight that hung there. But I loved it, a lot. I liked to rest my head against his stomach and let his easy breathing sway me to sleep, like the small ripple of waves washing through me.

Posted By Cassie On 09.16.2011 @ 5:36 pm

Nothing about them had ever been average. They didn’t meet in an average way. They didn’t come together in that typical sense. Their relationship was never conventional and when he left, that wasn’t average either. They were something strange and limitless, not meant to fit in one box or another. She had loved him with all of her heart and he had left her.

Posted By Cassie On 09.15.2011 @ 7:00 pm

the average person isnt really average. everyone is different. it has the word age in it. it has 2 a. there is 2 e in it too. its a very average word. It isnt very a nice word. i hate writing. i hate when people use to too and two in the wrong place.

Posted By cassie On 09.15.2011 @ 2:39 pm

“Is everyone accounted for?” He asks. The tiny crowd turns in on itself and someone counts heads. “She’s missing,” One of them say. “We must’ve lost her in the chaos.” There’s murmurs then and all eyes turn to their ‘leader’. It’s important because she and him…they were something.

Posted By Cassie On 09.14.2011 @ 4:53 pm

Rally the troops. They said you can’t inspire. They said you couldn’t command. Gather your people. Even if you fail here, the fates will give you another chance. They like you. Reincarnated again and again until it finally works. Until you’re standing on stage, the microphone replacing your sword.

Posted By Cassie On 09.13.2011 @ 12:04 pm

I wrote a song about you. I called it Trade because I remembered you said it was your favorite word. I had asked you why thinking maybe it was because we had traded him for you but you said you just liked how it felt in your mouth. I wrote that song for you, I often wonder if you listened to it and thought of me.

Posted By Cassie On 09.12.2011 @ 6:16 pm

My fingertips hover over your hip. I want to touch the naked skin but I’m afraid. You’re half asleep and curled naked in my sheets and I’ve touched you already in far less innocent places than just the curve of your hip. But you’re gentle when you’re asleep, vulnerable and still.

Posted By Cassie On 09.11.2011 @ 7:17 pm

You see a gentleman with a top hat and a cane – his eyes look familiar so you stop to stare. But he just walks on by, whistling a tune and dancing with the wind tapping at his back.

(and, right there, in the middle of the Big Easy, you fall in love with him).

Posted By Cassie On 09.10.2011 @ 2:21 pm

I could never distinguish myself from you. I couldn’t pick out the memories of my own life that didn’t have you right next to me or in the background. You were always a thought, always one of the first thoughts because that’s what happens when you spend almost all your life with the same person beside you.

Posted By Cassie On 09.10.2011 @ 2:06 pm

“You can’t fly,” They said. “We’ve clipped your wings.” But I never wanted to stop trying. Rattling bones and the warm touch of lips. That’s the last thing I remember feeling before I took the plunge and I knew, that even if I didn’t come back. They’d be fine without me.

Posted By Cassie On 09.09.2011 @ 12:46 pm

The metal of the monkey bars is cool against my palm and I remember being a kid, too gangly and loose limbed to be able to pull myself up to the top. My sneaker sips against the foot ladder and Jamie has to reach out to grab me so I can sit next to her on the top. Like this we overlook the shadowy playground.

Posted By Cassie On 09.08.2011 @ 6:12 pm

Sometimes I forget that you don’t exist solely for me. I forget that you weren’t made up of everything I could ever want in another human being. I forget that your heart doesn’t beat in time with mine like they’re twins. I forget you don’t love me.

Posted By Cassie On 09.07.2011 @ 3:05 pm

Glittery wings glowing in the delicate sunlight. I sit amongst the rocks and trees and nature at it’s finest and I don’t really exist here. I’m letting the world exist without me. I’m a quiet watcher, a sedentary observer.

Posted By Cassie On 09.06.2011 @ 3:14 pm

Little specks inching across the pavement. I’m laid out on my belly warm in the grass. The wind rolls over my sweat damp skin and I shiver with the feeling. It’s quiet and peaceful here and I can spend hours watching an ant explore a foot of cement.

Posted By Cassie On 09.05.2011 @ 12:54 pm

We divided and there was no conquer. We separated into two equal pieces interchangeable and he stops and thinks about what if it had gone the other way? Mix and match people in a broken world.

Posted By Cassie On 09.04.2011 @ 3:31 pm

“That’s an unusual name.” That was the second thing I ever said to her. She just shrugged and smiled. “We can’t all be named Mary, you know?” And that moment-amongst a handful of others-was the moment I fell in love with her.

Posted By Cassie On 09.03.2011 @ 1:54 pm

Bitter and strong on my tongue. His skin is salty with sweat and heavy with atmosphere. My fingers run up his naked heated thighs and he looks down at me with hungry, hungry eyes. I can’t look at him because it’s so much. He’s so much.

Posted By Cassie On 09.02.2011 @ 1:14 pm

I can hear the droplets of water dripping off the sponge and falling to their miniature demise in the smooth cool basin of the kitchen sink. I can hear the steady tick of each drop leaping into the unknown all the way from my bedroom. I know it then that I must be feeling lonelier than I ever have before.

Posted By Cassie On 09.01.2011 @ 12:23 pm

Ithink of avenues

Posted By Cassie On 08.31.2011 @ 6:46 pm

The place was hidden. It was tucked back amongst darkness and concrete, on a lonely forgotten avenue that hadn’t seemed to age like the rest of the town did. It was nowhere they wanted to spend a night at, but it was still better than sleeping in the car.

Posted By Cassie On 08.31.2011 @ 2:07 pm

“We need to go.” It was never an offer. Never “Do you want to go?” It was always, “We need to get out of here.” And I didn’t even think about it. I just glanced at his cold, cold hand, and listened for a heart that would never beat again. And we left.

Posted By Cassie On 08.30.2011 @ 2:41 pm

You could barely feel it. Like ghostly fingers running over your skin, making you shiver and feel full of something, an unknown presence you can’t begin to explain but it fills you up until you feel like you’re going to cry. Until your heart is so close to bursting.

Posted By Cassie On 08.29.2011 @ 11:22 am

I don’t believe it was just chance. I don’t believe it was a coincidence. I think meeting you was something more. I believe we’re something more. Everything we’ve been through, all the things we’ve done. It can’t possibly be an accident. I’ll never believe it was.

Posted By Cassie On 08.28.2011 @ 5:37 pm

A tapping noise and shiny heels and being berated by voices on a phone that at least have the decency to act polite in person. She never really imagined her life would turn out like this. This isn’t what she wanted.

Posted By Cassie On 08.27.2011 @ 5:44 pm

It was all broken. They were broken. Even the two that decided to stay together were in some ways still as broken as the ones who left. There was destruction everywhere. Every turn and memory leveled into an emotional wasteland.

Posted By Cassie On 08.26.2011 @ 3:09 pm

Taken with power, with strong fingers. He barks commands and shouts orders and the others cower a bit at the volume of his voice and the magnitude of his words. If he could not be perfect he would use whatever means possible to make sure his children were.

Posted By Cassie On 08.25.2011 @ 4:24 pm

It was raining still in the aftermath and you were sleeping in the bus. And I was with the others outside, texting him under the shade of my plastic-y yellow umbrella. You were scared, all the fight had gone out of you and then you couldn’t remember how you got to Europe. You couldn’t remember how you found me again. You said it was a feeling. You said you just felt like I needed you. You’re wrapped up in my sheets and you tell me you want to go home.

Posted By Cassie On 08.24.2011 @ 1:31 pm