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I love beer. I may love beer a little too much lately. My pants don’t feel like they used to, and I cannot look in the mirror without thinking about having that last beer that I shouldn’t have had. Crap. I am not good at this today.

Posted By Fender2010 On 05.07.2013 @ 5:55 pm

The onslaught will ensue next week on Tuesday! I am not ready to see the results of my 16 weeks of labor. Some will make me proud, while others will make me want to tear my hair out! It is always the same every year. Feelings of guilt, relief, and general gassiness ensue with the close of each new year.

Posted By Fender2010 On 04.30.2013 @ 1:06 pm

The bagel was not as good as it looked in the picture. I wonder if I can sue for false advertising? I should look into this cause I spent my last five dollars on that bagel and a shmear! Damn shame. Public Enemy was right–don’t believe the hype!

Posted By Fender2010 On 04.03.2013 @ 9:54 pm

I fabricated parts of my story to make my adventure seem more adventurous than it actually was. In reality, I was just as alone as I am when I am home. Sometimes traveling isn’t all that we crack it up to be in our minds. My trips are never as redemptive as I would like them to be, but that does not stop me from trying on the next trip.

Posted By Fender2010 On 04.01.2013 @ 8:07 pm

It came over me like a plague! I missed my time. How could I have been so stupid. I checked the book several times, but I guess I was over anxious and forgot how to read. I am disappointed. There’s always next year I guess. Even though this year was to be “my year”. Does this mean I missed my calling? Or am I destined to always be a day late and a dollar short. Story of many life.

Posted By Fender2010 On 03.30.2013 @ 1:12 pm

The truth is so very hard to tell, especially when what you believe to be the truth is being told to you with bits and pieces from other people’s experiences. Just because you didn’t live it, does that make it any less the truth. Validity, integrity, and purpose are costly.

Posted By Fender2010 On 03.18.2013 @ 3:19 pm

I withered in his presence. It had been two years since I saw him, but he still had that affect on me. I still loved him. I made out with him, and at the same time, I wanted to kill him. It had been over for more than two years, but I still melted when I saw him. Was this the gift he was trying to offer me, a brief dalliance in a shopping mall parking lot?

Posted By Fender2010 On 03.10.2013 @ 6:25 pm

It felt great. The bike was running smoothly. The helmet felt snug, and protective at the same time. The jacket…well what can I say? it felt leathery like it was supposed to. The day was perfect. All systems were go. Now if I can just figure out how to make a turn I would be set!

Posted By Fender2010 On 02.21.2013 @ 11:52 am

I thought I could will it into being, but the inspiration I was seeking had already been willed to someone else. Everything is possible, but nothing is happening.

Posted By Fender2010 On 02.15.2013 @ 3:00 pm

I fell flat on my face. I knew this was going to happen. People are always telling me to slow down, but I just can’t seem to remember that advice at the right time. At any rate, the cake made it. Now for the knife in my side! How the hell am I supposed to remove it without taking an organ with it? Sheesh.

Posted By Fender2010 On 02.13.2013 @ 12:58 pm

Babies are beautiful. Usually. Sometimes they are not as beautiful as they might appear. He smiled at me and I laughed. Poor child. It isn’t everyday that one sees a child that looks exactly like Burl Ives!

Posted By Fender2010 On 01.29.2013 @ 3:07 pm

cool. It is one of the whole reasons that I am pursuing a new hobby that is quite dangerous. Although many people are supporting me in my new endeavor, I am still apprehensive about my ability, money, and the image of someone who rides. I am completely confident in the fact that I will look cool, but what happens when I get myself into a situation that even I am not cool enough to get myself out of?

Posted By Fender2010 On 01.27.2013 @ 2:28 pm

The responsibility is all mine. Normally, knowing that I have to take hold of a situation doesn’t scare me, but this time, I have to admit that I am not sure if I can pull this one off. One thing is half settled;another is not even started. This could go either way. I could end up looking like a star, or I could end up looking like the fool that I feel like I am on the inside.

Posted By Fender2010 On 01.24.2013 @ 12:11 pm

The musical was as uninteresting as I had originally believed. The dancing monkeys were a blast. Even when the smallest one fell out of step, the other monkeys kept rockin’ on. I felt for the little monkey. Everyone isn’t able to keep time, sing, and play the harmonica at the same time. We should all be so talented!

Posted By Fender2010 On 01.23.2013 @ 2:26 pm

My speech was changing. I had been working very hard on not using bad language, alas I have given up. Some things just must be iterated with coarse or profane language. Nothing gets the job done faster than saying: get your asses to work you lazy sons of bitches! Nice!

Posted By Fender2010 On 01.14.2013 @ 12:43 pm

The need is incredible once you forget to attach your crutch. The day began as normal as any other. Little did I know that only minutes after leaving the house that I would fall prey to my demons and use again. It was the beginning of the end.

Posted By Fender2010 On 11.04.2012 @ 1:05 pm

They seemed to understand what I was describing, but that “deer in the headlight” look in their eyes spoke volumes. How on earth can you get someone to learn something that don’t understand. Hell, for some of them, just getting to class on time and in one piece was lesson enough!

Posted By Fender2010 On 02.11.2013 @ 7:38 pm

I do not feel the same level of. Omfort that I felt two or three days ago. The hour is upon us. Come Monday, school will begin and all of the wonder and surprise of summer will be over. I am happy and sad at the same time. I hope the joy I found this summer lasts through the rest of the year! It is hard to keep those good vibrations going. Ahh. Summer.

Posted By Fender2010 On 08.20.2012 @ 2:48 pm

The methods I have used to keep my brother out of my home have failed miserably. Sometimes family just.sucks. Other times, family rocks. I am not sure which time it is now.

Posted By Fender2010 On 08.01.2012 @ 12:35 am

The bucket sat curiously on the edge of the sidewalk. It had been there for at least an hour, as I didn’t notice it when I left the house earlier. When I approached, the bucket began to shake. The sounds coming from the inside were small gurgles.

Posted By Fender2010 On 07.08.2012 @ 9:40 pm

The computer was kept calling. I did all I could to ignore it for two days straight. At the last minute, I checked my email. As usual, the whining and begging was of epic proportions. Why do people wait til the last minute to make a plea for a better score. No amount of begging will save you now. It’s done, and I’m done, for that matter!

Posted By Fender2010 On 05.20.2012 @ 11:42 am

I hit the base, but nothing happened. I read the directions, had all of my ingredients in the tub, but nothing was happening. I don’t understand. It is not rocket science. When I finally realized that it wasn’t plugged in, I felt that all of my education was for naught! How can someone so accomplished be so simple?

Posted By Fender2010 On 05.18.2012 @ 2:19 pm

The shorthand message was on the wall: “Stay out of the office”. I knew this was the best course of action, but against my better judgement… I got sucked in. Now I am worried about my participation in the office gossip, banter, and general talk amongst colleagues. Tomorrow is another day, and I will live to “keep my ideas to myself” another day.

Posted By Fender2010 On 05.08.2012 @ 5:13 pm

His charms were irresistible. I was at a loss for words, something that does not happen often. I dove in head first. I was smitten with the easy smile, the skin, and the beautiful hair. Little did I know that his charms masked a serious case of low self-esteem.

Posted By Fender2010 On 03.31.2012 @ 8:44 pm

My temper has gotten so much better lately. I only had two small incidents this week. In one, I settled it with my words much faster than in the past. In the other, well…let’s just say the cell wasn’t as bad or stinky as the last one. I really wish they would get better lunches for inmates!

Posted By Fender2010 On 03.25.2012 @ 3:37 pm

I am in it for the duration. Each day it gets harder and harder to remember just exactly why I am taking this course. It is literally hinged on life and death. The benefits are obvious, but my will is not always focused on the right things. I continue to struggle every day, but I know that I if I continue on this path, good things will indeed come to fruition.

Posted By Fender2010 On 03.14.2012 @ 11:26 pm

The petition seemed harmless. She reluctantly signed her name on the last line of the page. Suddenly, a feeling of dread and regret washed over her when she realized that “Donald Duck” was not an appropriate choice for a replacement for the mayor of the small burg. She walked away thinking…”oh no. what have I done now?”

Posted By Fender2010 On 03.13.2012 @ 5:37 pm

She recycled the can as she always did. She tried to make everything seem as normal as possible. Little did the rest of the office know that the Diet Pepsi can recently added to the recycling bin would not be radioactive. The last drop of Diet Pepsi slowly dripped out of the upside down can, puddling next to a can of Mountain Dew.

Posted By Fender2010 On 03.11.2012 @ 7:37 pm

The gourmet cheeses were calling out to me. I wanted them as much as they wanted me to want them! Evil cheese! I made my way to the chip aisle and secretly prayed to God to make the voices of the various cheeses stop taunting me. Just then, I noticed the small can of spray cheese. I reached the can of “american”, and hung my head in failure.

Posted By Fender2010 On 03.10.2012 @ 6:25 pm

I thought I was a professional when I got the job. Then I thought I was a professional when I got the title. When I got the check, I realized that I am no where near being a professional at this job or at any other job. Sheesh. Education isn’t all that it’s cracked up to be.

Posted By Fender2010 On 03.06.2012 @ 12:24 am