Entries By beatrice
Displaying 1 To 30 Of 33 Entries
punished
I don’t want to be punished. I didn’t do anything. Why do they wanto do punish me? I was so clever in doing my duties.
Posted By Beatrice On 04.08.2013 @ 4:49 am
suggestion
Suggestions—they don’t really matter, you know?
Once people have made their minds about something, whatever you suggest, they shrug off.
They may seem to want your opinion. They may run to you, crying for help.
But they don’t want to hear it. They don’t want to hear your opinion.
They don’t want your suggestion.
They just want you, and your ears, and your open heart.
Posted By beatrice On 07.11.2012 @ 1:13 am
cap
I don’t really know what it means. In french, suivre le cap (follow the cap), means ‘follow that direction’. Like when you’re sailing. Or just on a boat. It applies to life in general too i guess.
Posted By beatrice On 06.03.2012 @ 1:04 pm
separate
Being separated from him was like being cut from my skin. The emptiness reverberated through my like the sounds from his DJ table. It hurt like fire. But I couldn’t get in the way of his happiness. Touring the world is hat he wanted, who was I to make him stay. It would’ve been like telling him not to breathe.
Posted By Beatrice On 05.02.2012 @ 3:24 pm
duration
this is going to go happen for a really long time ation rhymes with bation im tired and this class has been going on for the longest duration of time it lasts for ever for the rest of the duration of my senior year i am going to not do anything productive in class the end this is long.
Posted By Beatrice On 03.15.2012 @ 9:49 am
tires
tires, like a car’s tire, like a car,s that get messed up. No idea how i can screw a car that much. But still, my little car’s now a wrecké
Posted By Beatrice On 11.05.2011 @ 3:49 pm
mutual
love is mutual. if it isn’t mutual, it isn’t love. every human interaction is mutual…and mutuality is mutual in itself…if that makes any sense. everything is mutual. everything and nothing.
i don’t know how to write these things.
Posted By Beatrice On 10.19.2011 @ 8:26 am
warfare
Warfare is everywhere. It’s silent but deadly, it’s loud and obnoxious, it overcomes and overtakes and heads us into an oblivion of which we are unaware. We don’t know why we’re here, we don’t know what we’re doing here…but the reason is warfare. The reason is that something happened to us somewhere along the line, and we broke down. We’re broken.
Posted By Beatrice On 10.16.2011 @ 9:46 pm
warfare reminds me of andrew.then again, everything reminds me of andrew. but warfare does most of all…because warfare might equal death for him..and that would mean death for me. it’s not something that i want to happen, obviously, but it’s something that might have to happen. because warfare equals peace…or something like that. warfare equals peace.
Posted By Beatrice On 10.16.2011 @ 9:45 pm
compassion
I look at his face and see that there are tears in his eyes. I am suddenly overcome by the need to hug him, the need to bury my face in his shoulder and thank him for feeling that way. But here we are, both stuck in our spots, standing and staring and feeling something warm inside of ourselves that is certainly not romantic love.
Posted By Beatrice On 10.13.2011 @ 8:19 pm
setting
The waves are listless – a crash, a thump. The sky is warm, reds and oranges and yellows painting it in a wonderful light. This place soothes you. And you wiggle your toes, reminding yourself of the beauty and fragility of it all.
Posted By Beatrice On 10.06.2011 @ 11:10 pm
warned
I tried to warn him. I tried to tell him that it would be a bad decision on his part. Did he listen? No. It was always like this. Not once did he ever consider what I’ve been trying to tell him, not once did he consider the gravity of the situation. Not once did he ever consider what I’d feel were he to perish because of his bad decisions.
Posted By Beatrice On 10.05.2011 @ 1:11 pm
morality
Say that you’re a criminal. Do you not have morals as well? Morals are not just about a compass directing you to the “goodness” of the planet. Morals are what you believe in, and it is never a concrete principle. There are lines that blur constantly when you talk about morals.
Posted By Beatrice On 10.04.2011 @ 6:03 pm
Is it a question of beliefs and principles? Morality is not merely a division of black and white. One must remember that there are shades of gray as well. There is no definite and correct moral compass. It varies.
Posted By Beatrice On 10.04.2011 @ 5:59 pm
suppose
Suppose? I suppose that’s a fair enough word. Simple, yet when you think about it, it’s quite bizarre. We use it in everyday conversion. But do we know its origins?
Posted By Beatrice On 10.04.2011 @ 10:03 am
wishing
My one perfect wish: For once, can I be truely happy? Just as soon as I think things are going absolutely perfect, it’s amazing how quickly one event can completely change that. Wishing has never truely done anything for me, but keeping high hopes and a positive attitude can pick you right back up and keep you going.
Posted By Beatrice On 12.29.2010 @ 2:52 pm
lucky
I am so beyon lucky to have someone like him. To what this statement sounds of, you may think I am describing a ‘boyfriend’ or a ‘friend with benefits’. However, I am decribing what I consider to be my best friend, even though we are mistaken otherwise. He is intellegent, loyal, commical, and there to have my back with everything. No matter what, I can depend on him. Best of all, I feel completely safe with him. Lucky is an understatement to explain him.
Posted By Beatrice On 12.27.2010 @ 5:51 pm
obvious
Most of us are very unaware of the most obvious things in life. For example, our lives are obviously much easier than those of others, but yet, we complain about the small things, and take the big things for granted.
Posted By Beatrice On 12.25.2010 @ 6:54 pm
altar
Her white dress makes her even more beautiful than she is and she i perfect in every possible way. I am ready to give myself to her and make this commitment last until i decease, as I would do anything in the world for her. In this marriage, I will look forward to waking up to her flawless face every morning, and I will always remember the feeling of seeing her walk up to the altar to devote herself to me, the lukiest guy in the world.
Posted By Beatrice On 12.25.2010 @ 9:28 am
paperclips
All that was left in my sister’s room was the homemade box containing paper clips that her twin brother made for her in the third grade. I saved it because I knew it would mean a lot later in life. Everything else was thrown away because my mother didn’t want to have anything that reminded her of her daughter, my older sister. The car accident sent our family’s spirits into a deep hole, and it is predicted that it will definately take a lot to pick us back up.
Posted By Beatrice On 12.22.2010 @ 4:51 pm
spike
grown
When a tree strats its a seed…then that seed is watered and nutured….It endures snow and wind and footprints…until one day years later a oak stands…fully grow
Posted By Beatrice On 10.08.2010 @ 10:27 am
bongos
offer
there the green line goes even though it’s so tinry and i just wrote about this freaking word and it really sucks and derek is just yawning and it’s so messed up because he does messed up things and i feel better about myself, also this song taught me who clark gable was. i was so emo and dderek is dying and cannot understand anything and sixty seconds is such a long time
Posted By beatrice On 05.12.2009 @ 11:09 pm
deny
Oh my deny. That is a word that takes in a lot of memories and actions today. I deny that I have a problem with drinking, but the first thing I think about is when I can go buy a beer when my daughter is not watching. I am so old I do not have a desire for sex, not, I deny my desire and still look at dudes in the same way I did 40 years ago. Deny, who me? Are you nuts, I am just too fucking old to pretend I want things anymore. Oh, is that big lie or what. Okay, I deny my true feelings, I deny I have any feelings most of the time. Then I deny the truth about the fact that I deny anything. Oh fuck. I deny being alive and old and wanting things I can no longer have. Yah I want them but it is easier on other people if I deny that I do. Oh, let me go to bed now and sleep, maybe, that denial at least does not effect anyone else in my life.
Posted By Beatrice On 11.28.2008 @ 8:35 pm
wanted
the way that we all want to feel. It is a state of desire with a hint of lust. To be wanted is a secure feeling it is what I want to be.
Posted By Beatrice On 09.08.2009 @ 7:35 pm
broken
Hearts, promises, tv’s, computers, cars. I used to say “I am bent, but not broke”. That was before I became ill. Now I am broke but my spirit is not broken. Makes it hard though when other things get broken, no money to get them fixed, ya know? I fell in love when I was 23, he broke my heart, and disappeared. I found him again, 40 years later, this time he repaired my broken heart, only to leave me for a new existence on another plane. He is an angel now, I guess, for all his faults and shortcomings. He finally told me that he loved me. I love him still, and when he died, my heart broke again but not for the same reasons I had when I was 23. So here I am, talking to strangers about being broken. Nope, I am sad at the loss of him, but his love did make me whole again, and I know it won’t take another 40 years till we are together once again.
Posted By Beatrice On 12.21.2008 @ 9:48 am
held
Sixteen years. That is a long time to have a companion. Though sometimes I was certainly ready to just throw her out the door. Her eyes were the color of grapefruit juice at times, clear and kind of yellowy green. Tonight I held her in my arms and her eyes were cloudy. She had not eaten for days, and I was force-feeding water with an eye dropper. Ah, my little furry friend, I will miss you so. We had a good life together. Oh yes, I do believe that cats go to heaven. Now, I can only hold you in my memories. Farewell, see you when I get there.
Posted By Beatrice On 11.21.2008 @ 8:33 am
pit
so i love matt so much. it hurts sometimes. and im scared alot. because.. well. he dissapears. often actually. and he never tells me where to. and he always comes back with these scratches and wounds all over him. and he has a gun. and a knife. why the fuck did i pick the sketchiest guy i know to like. awesome. woah. the time is over but im still writting. i thought itd cut me off.
Posted By beatrice On 08.30.2009 @ 2:10 am
