Entries By starz
Displaying 1 To 19 Of 19 Entries
Not just art – good art. The implication of skill. Talent. A standard. But of what, exactly? Technique? Originality? Realism? Emotivism? I may have just made that last word up. I digress… sometimes my favorite works of art are the ones that come out nothing like how I wanted them to. I suppose that means I am an amateur. Good.Posted By starz On 10.26.2011 @ 7:54 pm
this is no detour. this is paying your dues. writing this paper is all i have to do. it’s all i need to keep my on this path. to get to that place where i can do what i love all the time. i will try to stop complaining. i should be grateful that this is the only thing in my way. it’s just a fucking paper.Posted By starz On 05.02.2010 @ 11:14 am
thump thump bump rump. slow it down, please. keep that hip hop heart beat in rhythm with the tick tock (you don’t stop). but! the meter made me do it!
ok. that’s a lie. it wasn’t the meter. it was the way he looked at me.
my brain may have told romeo to fuck off, but my peach fish has a slight difference in opinion…Posted By starz On 05.14.2009 @ 9:28 am
a reason not to do my homework. to stay up late and smoke cigarettes on my back porch. to cook fancy meals. to buy cute underwear. to write love songs. to upgrade to unlimited text messaging. to agonize over a mixed cd. to change my sheets more regularly. to avoid puddles out of fear of being splashed.
a reason to stop onewords like these.Posted By starz On 09.08.2009 @ 10:01 pm
the whole of me tingles with her sweet everythings. she whispers them in my ears and they ring and sing in octaves my stone steel colored alto voice could never hope to reach. and i call myself a realist to hide the deprecation behind a carefully woven cape of confidence that is true but full of swiss cheese arguments and for you literal readers that means there are massive. gaping. holes.Posted By starz On 09.08.2009 @ 8:12 am
bubble gum burst, baby. green glitter flecks of trouble bubble in your eyes. the haze of new city lights clear. fear ignites, among other things burning inside me now. my mind is no longer free… to focus on me.
i envision marks of my lipstick dancing on your collar, neck, cheeks, lips… there has been a rip in my time space continuum. please. tear slowly.Posted By starz On 09.06.2009 @ 12:52 pm
how is it that we are back here again? how is it that no matter how far i push or pull or bend or break, it all comes back to this. this same room. this same internet window. is this home? or is this just my holding pad? what is it that will finally stick? what is it that i have been waiting for?Posted By starz On 01.01.1970 @ 12:00 am
i can see you clearly now.
… hadn’t really been focused before. you were a side note annoyance. something to just deal with… from time to time. not anymore.
my skin crawls now. painfully — acutely aware of your presence.
behaviors put themselves on exhibit! just like symptoms on a medical chart. thrust forward. directly. in my face.
sorry. i know. psychology students think they know everything.
must i make case studies out of everyone who puts me
… on a pedestal?Posted By starz On 11.24.2009 @ 7:00 am
black. white. black. white. paint me up and down… separate my tomorrows from yesterdays. but i never meant it in the way we say “this is right and you are wrong” because sharp contrasts bleed grey down here… underground. each line of color, threaded tightly to the next… we are not just a random sequence of events.Posted By starz On 11.22.2009 @ 4:01 pm
instincts pull me to type “i can’t handle this.”
but is that force really instinct… or habit?
i have been playing the self doubt card for too long. especially because i know that it has been a front from the beginning.
i can handle this. and whatever else you want to throw at me.
… i guess the cop out has been that i didn’t really want to.Posted By starz On 11.20.2009 @ 6:48 am
forever and ever amen threatens to begin again and this time i have to pretend that i am more secure than previously mentioned and what happens if i let all of this in and it falls tragically by the wayside of “friends” and i give up on on this dream of blank space and hidden grace and this magical move to become who i am takes me farther away from where we could have been and now he + she only = me.Posted By starz On 11.19.2009 @ 10:13 am
pluck these pretty piece of me off one by one; need by need.
wear me down slow, work me in quick. don’t let any body know about it.
disappointments turn into doubts and i think that now i’ve figured it out:
swear yourself to secrecy but the bottom line is that you might just be
… embarrassed to be seen with me.Posted By starz On 12.06.2009 @ 7:56 am
that pucker on her lips isn’t there in hopes of a kiss. sour and slumped – no grind. and NO bump. she overfills her days so she can sleep through her nights and emotion overspills into her mind so she can justify her plight. she sits in her puddle of pity pool party excuses and i remember when i was the one spouting the stream of “it’s no use”s.Posted By starz On 01.23.2010 @ 4:53 pm