jagerbaby0919
You harnessed all your lies to my neck
weighing about thirty pounds too heavy,
you pushed me to the ground
and told me, "Girl, just stay steady".
You proceeded to bagged up all your fears
bringing in a good forty plus
and threw it over my shoulders
questioning me, "Girl, what's all the fuss?"
You then quickly netted all your guilt
to the sum of fifty pounds
and tied it all around my waist
and demanded me, "Girl, don't make a sound."
the consumption of his words brought on the production of dreams manifested
but the corruption of his deception developed in her brain an equilibrium fully congested.
Father,
my faith
its lethargic at best
exhausted and extinguished
from treading through the mud of this world.
My shoes are worn tattered,
my clothes "holy"
though my skin feels sacrificed.
My world,
it breeds venom
while my heart seeks benevolence.
I was made a woman,
a woman with a purpose so I am told
but what is a woman to do
when she is belittled to just a little girl?
Jaded, dismissed,
imprisoned by strife
at the many trials breed to my "feeble faith".
Yet I desire to transpire
through these murky waters
and rise about to your mountain top
where I grow and bloom
into a woman
stronger than ever before,
wings spread wide and flying
over these empires so high
that I skim what could be the very tip
of your kingdom come.
Release me from the chains!
That lock away the passion I have gained
from your righteous right hand
and merciful force of love.
Let me blossom,
let me fly!
High on eagles wings
overcoming my position as an earth dweller,
to be able to proclaim
the vast deliverance and love of You, my King.
Take this heart
as I lay it on your table
and cut it open wide for you to be able
to carve it into your creation
so bold, beautiful and eternal
as your Son that settles the sky each day
Your act of love paternal.
My scalp aches for your grasp,
And my body longs for your domination.
My mouth waters for your intrusion,
And my skin crawls to feel your sensation
to spill onto in like lava from an
exploding force known like no other,
The whole of me craves
that celestial feeling of pleasure
that can only be found in the soul of a lover.
Over me,
Under me,
and buried deep within...
Satiate my need to feed, I beg of you
My Master,
Place on my face a devious,
Cheshire grin.
With your skin so smooth,
Fitted over muscle so hard,
You make it quite impossible to stop you from
breaking down my guards.
But break them down, you may.
I, Queen, grant you that power...
By spreading my thighs and gifting to you
the pleasure of my precious flower.
I delight in the sunrise. And the sunset. I delight in the mew of a kitten or the bark of an old dog. I delight in the mega-watt smile of that boy that I can't seem to get out of my head. And I delight in the embrace that my current partner holds me each and every night. Delights can seem so sweet, until they start to hurt.
I neither have to diminish nor embellish His love for me. I often drift from the understanding that he promised me life, not death. He gave His Son for me that I would not be condemned, but saved. So that rock I tend to hide UNDER? Well, I'm going to start my climb to the top so that I can stretch out my arms, open my hands and allow God's grace to shower upon my life. After all, that's why I was created: to be unconditionally loved.
Look ahead, she thought to herself. Just look ahead. Yeah, it stings...the scrapes that map out her knobby knees, the thin trail of bright crimson dripping down her leg. She would get out of these woods, she wouldn't let him have her. Even if it killed her.
She heard a light splash from behind her. She quickly turned to find a small, chestnut hued sparrow submerging his plump little body into the birdbath that her brother had bought her for Christmas last winter.
"We don't have any birds here, Lane. The neighborhood cats eat them all".
"Well, I guess you're just going to have to take on the new role as guardian then, won't you?"
Taige just stared at him for a minute as if he had just sprouted three individual heads.
"I hate birds. You know this. Hate them!"
"Well, T....don't you think that now would be a good time to learn to love something instead of hating it?" Lane had inquired.
Taige watched as the little feathered friend chirped at her as though he knew the what was running around in her mind. And then she did something she hadn't done in years.
She began to whistle.
She crouched on her knees in the darkest corner of her small closet, gripping a butterknife she had snuck from the kitchen weeks ago. She pushed and pushed with all her might that dull blade against the old wooden floor boards, trying to get the letters A and R and C and R...Alan Reyes for her father and Carla Reyes for her mother. She would make sure she did not forget to carve the heart that was meant to fit between her parents initials. She would NOT forget. Her hand ached and her head throbbed in agony as she continues to work the knife into the ground, trying to let the scrapping sounds overwhelm the clash of broken dishes and screams that were bleeding down the walls of the house she grew up in.
"No, Alan...no, please. I'm sorry! Please!"
Then there was a loud thud as something heavy, heavy enough to be a person, hit the ground.
Beth began to carve the heart, struggling to focus her vision through the tears that burned her senses.
She gazed out at the skyline, wondering what it would be like to just leave. Just leave with nothing. Leave it all behind...her clothes, books, car, everything. She wondered what the thrill of just jumping into a cab out on 36th St. and just going until her money runs out would do to her. Quench her thirst for discovery or lead to a road of worry. Her fingers danced lightly along the concrete wall as she gave into the thoughts of foreign travels and fresh faces, disconnected from anything ever know to her.
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