owleye
i spend most minutes wondering over you. anything about you. usually i wonder if you miss me too. i wonder what you are doing and what you would be doing if i was there. i wonder if you still love me. if you are still waiting for me. if you ever remember me. i wonder if you wonder about me too.
he came in the middle of july. the air was hot and dense with humidity and longing and hurt. he came, and he took what he needed. what he wanted. he grabbed at whatever he could find. the easiest most obvious things. my jewels, my clothes, my belief in certain things such as love and charity. he took my caring and doting and smothering. he took my glances and touches. my worries and hopes. he snatched everything in sight up. but he missed my most valuable possession. my most hidden and prized. my deepest pocket remained untouched. he left my heart.
we are sitting at the table awaiting the aromas from the other room to materalize as edible portions before us. a clatter of pans erupts and muffled curse. our ears prick up but we make no move to help. our bodies are glued to our chairs from anticipation. it was father's birthday and mother had promised a genorous feast of the most gourmet kind. she brought the main dish our covered. behind her followed the servents with various delicious smelling dishes. our eyes wandered and lustfully followed the plates as our mouths watered. mother beamed as she placed the main event in front of father. "here you are dear, happy birthday." we were warm, and happy, and without a care.
i count the freckles along your arm. 4. around your shoulders and down your back. your skin is smooth, the shades vary from the sun. i trace the veins along your arm, the muscles ripple against my fingertips. i feel you shiver. my pulse quickens.
everything about you is tempting. i can't keep my hands off. i can't tear my eyes away. i want you to want me. chase after me and rip off my clothes. you look at me with hatred and that only tempts me more. to get close to you. to touch you. to push myself against you. my body is aching for yours. my chemicals are firing in my mind. eveything says more. more. more. i want you more.
i have forgotton how your eyes look right before you kiss me. i have forgotton the way your words sound as the fell in my ears and spelled out my name. i have forgotton the day we first met, and what it was that first drew me to you. i have forgotton the day i first knew.
the clear liquid burns my throat. i shakily set the glass back down. i don't like watered down drinks with the juice or ice or sugar. i take it straight. get to the point. i want to get drunk to cloud my judgment, so i won't have to remember what i am about to do. i am creating an excuse. i safetey net. the fire begins in my belly and i pour down more gasoline, igniting the flames. i lean into you, invading your personal space, hoping you'll get the hint. to kiss me, to hold me, to fuck me. i only want you tonight. in the morning i may change my mind. this may be bad idea, in the morning. but tonight. i want you. i drain the rest of my glass.