phodev
as i looked at him, siting there on the stand, struggling through the agonizing moments of silence before the jury announced their verdict, i couldn't help but feel sorry for him. perched up on the stage with the entire courtroom's eyes on him, scrutinizing every move he made, every fidget, tremble and twitch of the finger. while he sat up there, completely exposed, with the world ready and waiting to watch him at his most vulnerable, for the first time in this whole trial i saw the human being in that man. i saw the pure fear in his eyes as his sentencing was read aloud. and when his shoulders crumpled and his thin body caved in on itself and his head dropped to his chest and was shaken by great heaving sobs, he was finally real. as his head tipped back and his mouth lay agape shaking with silent cries, in his eyes, red and teary, i saw everything he knew coming to a screeching, crippling halt.
and it was terrifying.
and in all the flashing and the shouting, suddenly they're reduced to nothing but bodies. masses of life pushing and shoving, greedy and hungry for information only i can give. their faces turned up in breathless anticipation, glistening with a sheen of sweat as they lean in as close as they can, desperate for me to say those words they need to hear so they can turn it into a headline.
but in the tumult, they seem practically subhuman, animalistic and ravenous.
humans reduced to elbows and fists as they shove and kick to get to the information first.
as one rams into another, like dominoes the whole herd jostles. their skeletons knock against one another, rattling and clattering against their hollow bones.
the strong survive and the weak are found and driven out with cries of surprise as their hard earned spots are seized by those who simply fought harder.
animals. there are animals before me.