pocketdoll

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cry

When my parents are nice to me, I cry. When my parents are mean to me, I cry. When my parents ignore me, I cry. I feel like I grew out of this house like it's a favorite old sweater-- but I keep trying to wear it, no matter how itchy and uncomfortable it is--

stretcher

They slid her stiff body onto the stretcher. She did not move a muscle.... her face did not even twitch. She lay there calmly, as if she had not been removed from her bed at all. She lay there, but then I realized it wasn't really she who lay there, but her body.

outlet

I needed an outlet for my thoughts. So I bought a journal... a small little notebook that is basically my mind dump. In only three months I've told it so much; it's a part of me, I take it with me wherever I go. It hasn't replaced you... I think it's only made me more comfortable with you. I think it has allowed me to accept things more readily, to think more closely, to really get to know who I am.

writing since 2010 · 16 entries · 15 days shown up

each square is a day—lit means Clara showed up.

2longest streak

15days written

0.1entries / week

on this day 16 years ago

Clara wrote about cross
“I keep my grandfather's cross in my back pocket wherever I go. It is how I know that he is with me, even when I am alone and in darkness. He keeps me safe. Unfortunately this has only been so sin…”

the words Clara reaches for

wishbucketlayparentscrywhereveralonetoprespectablewearsupportmatterunderstoodhappymeanobsessed