tessgm
I am beloved of myself but I wonder who else would describe me as their beloved. The word reminds me of the song by Yusuf Islam, so beautiful. And it's a beautiful word in itself. Almost an imperative: be loved. I wonder how I command myself to be loved. It seems like an impossible task but it shouldn't be approached as a task, not a job of work.
I went to my brother's funeral in fact I organised it. It seemed to cost a lot of money but I felt ashamed to choose the cheap option. I wonder if that says more about me than anyone else. I mourned him. A lot. I saw him die. It was peaceful and beautiful. I hope I die like that. Not yet.
writing since 2011 · 2 entries · 2 days shown up
each square is a day—lit means Tess showed up.
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the words Tess reaches for
wonderbeautifuldiebelovedwordlovedtaskbrother'sfuneralfactorganisedcostmoneyashamedchoosecheap