amn34
you held my hand as we watched the thunderous sky opening before us. we overlooked the city as the clouds turned a deep shade of ash and screamed down at the rooftops.
i hadn't really thought about dying much until i got the call. neighbors started swarming in from all around us, bouquets of cheap roses and store bought cookies invading the living space that was once his. it was as though the universe had to make sure we all knew this wasn't his place anymore. this wasn't the home that he loved. the home that he loved was full of laughter, and music, and love- which we had unceremoniously replaced with lorazepam, knowing glances and frozen lasagnas.
i was always afraid of the furnace that sat crouching in the corner of our unfinished basement. it beckoned to me, knobs and grill arranging themselves into a smirk, as if they knew i'd never have the courage to go over there and confront it myself.
you were always kind to me. kissing the blotches that never really there when i fell down running.