crawdkenny
The decorations were ugly, but my wife insisted on them. My daughter's first wors was phlegm, and today was her graduation party. ??Naturally this meant that all the decorations were related to phlegm.
The crew of my vessel stopped and looked at me. Were we really going to go charging into that dark caver filled with monsters all because one stole my dinner? Yes we were. They threatened mutiny, but I knew they'd comply, they need their paychecks after all. In this day and age where there are fewer ships by the day, they need jobs, and obeying my orders is their job.
The king's adviser told him that he needed help. The king, in his usual drunken stupor, completely denied it and walked off, his robe completely unbuttoned with his privates sticking out for the whole kingdom to see, Who could keep the king in check, the adviser wondered? This kingdom was the world's laughing stock.
My wife had one suggestion for me. That suggestion was the beginning of the end for our marriage, Her suggestion was something that I just couldn't change. She should have known that. My constant eating of ox penis was what made her fall in love with me, or so she said. Why, if I hadn't intrigued her by eating it on our second date, she would have thought me forgettable. Unfortunately, I just wasn't allowed to eat it in front of her friends.