emilykate15
It's not a word you hear everyday, and I bet you'd be surprised at how many don't even know its meaning. It means to occur after an event. I've been pretty down lately, at that point in my life where things could either go one way or another. A crossroads, I believe. But the only thing is, I have no clue which way is north or which is south. I'm surrounded by the endings of my former beginnings with no clue what my first step should be. What will happen tomorrow? The next day? The future is really only a collection of tomorrows, each one day at a time. Its much easier to live life with that in mind, I suppose.
Cities can be fantastic. Night lights, night life, night people. Drinks in bars with crowded strangers, hoping for a night unlike any other. Friends you think you can always count on, and sometimes you can, if only for a little while. Cities, though, can be dark, scary, dirty, grey with puddles and stinking of misery and loneliness. There is always a good, and the bad is never far away.
I'm staring at the screen and all that comes to be is a picture of a finger slipping through a ring. A small metal band, meaningless in itself but yet so full of importance in all it promises. A promise is supposed to mean something, it is supposed to be eternal, hard, unbreakable, much like that ring. But lately I find that the ring must be made of spiderweb, and promises have lost their charm.
I need to be satisfied enough in the present that I need not worry about the future. I need to be patient.
I always wondered what it would be like to be suspended in jelly. Ignore the fact that you can't breathe and it would be quite lovely. No noise, no one else, just you. And perhaps that sweet sticky taste of summer and strawberries and baby kisses. It would feel wonderful for a few minutes and perhaps you'd get to eat some. But then you'd get tired of it, as we all do. No matter how much we want something, it will eventually bore us to the point of insanity. You'd bang on the sides of the jar, screaming but no one can hear you. You'd desperately try to claw your way up only to find that the tar-like mass only drags you down. Something you enjoyed is destroying you. At some point you'd give up, settle down to the bottom of the jar and realize that the only way to get rid of something edible is to, well, eat it. Thats how we find ourselves--at midnight, spread out on the couch, an empty pizza box...we've got to breathe again.
It's never anything I expect. Cool eyes, serene, watching me. They watch to see how I'm fitting in. It's as if they like it.
I woke up feeling a thin line of sunlight across my cheek. I was surrounded by patterns. Light came in vertically from the wide windows which were still open from last night, waving in the breeze. The light met on the shelves, reflected off their metal nails. His head, softly asleep on the pillow next to me, was a curly mess of hair, a pattern of unrulyness, his chest gently rising and falling. There were birds outside and I felt giddy, hopeful, excited. The day was ours. And we had the rest of our lives to enjoy it.
a white piece of paper scribbled with unintelligible scratchings. They tell you to sign so you feel important, like you're part of something. But your name is just another marking. You're voice does not count because it blends in with all the others. And when you're out in space you can see all the petitions and all the signatures of people who think they matter and it all blends into one. So you can't see where your ink ends and a stranger's begins. Because from far away, we're all the same.
it was a cold, misty night. Far off in the distance was a tiny bead of light. It danced on the horizon, flirted with me. Each step i took brought it nearer, yet i never seemed to reach it. I began to lose track of time caught in the endless journey towards something i feared i would never touch, never hold. And yet, unreachable, that single glowing ember held much more value for me than if i had grasped it, if i had been able to walk the distance. For it's value was not placed on its presence upon reaching it, but value was found in the journey of merely walking towards it. Life tends to be funny that way. And i must learn to enjoy the walk.
different things tend to lift me up. the smell of popcorn cooking in the kitchen while my family watches old movies in the living room. Laundry. My dog after being washed. These things are a part of life, maybe the most important part.
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