helenlindsay
in the quiet stillness, i can do nothing but wonder where you are and if you're thinking of me.
oh, to be glowing.
to be a ray of happy light, spilling onto others.
instead of a cluster of shadows, casting sadness upon everything.
You are the chief operating executive of my own life.
though i might make executive decisions, You ultimately make them happen.
You also sign my paychecks. so thanks.
i never know what you're doing.
even though you do.
you always do.
a slick step, a quick lip.
the heart skips a quick beat.
and i am lost in a sea of awkward confusion.
at least you're here with me.
everything ended for you in a split second.
buzz, buzz, buzz, land.
with a bend of my elbow i crushed everything about you. your body. your mind. your past. your present.
your future.
i wish i could have been in the temple when Jesus turned all the tables.
what a freakin' BA.
my coworkers at my old job used to call me "linds flare." as in, a play on "lens flare," a video effect used to transition between shots.
it was probably the coolest nickname i'll ever have.
yesterday was valentine's day. several women my age were huddled in a corner stuffing their face with chocolate, cursing the wretched holiday amidst their singledom.
all of it makes me ill. from chocolate to sadness.
hey you! yeah, you over there with the camel! think you can jump through this hoop?
"coward" is the name of my all time favorite poem:
Bravery runs in my family.
- e.e. cummings
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