rapunzel
She had eyes so dark they were almost black. I remember that. She wore pink, squarish glasses most days, some days contacts. I remember how she sometimes wore her hair down and sometimes put in in a ponytail. But what I can't seem to recall is her laugh, or all the jokes she told me. It's harder now for me to hear her voice in my mind. I don't remember the way she walked, or the way she smelled, or even how it felt the day she held my hand. I'm getting over her. It's what I've wanted to do since the moment she left, and now that I'm finally doing it... why do I want to go back?
She's missing. Panic, frantic, I have to look for her, I have to find her. Here yesterday, gone today. Last I saw she was wearing a cap and gown, and now she's gone. Someone took her, I know. Who? Time.
My biology teacher has a cupboard full of animals. None of them are alive, of course, which I think makes it worse. Some are in jars, some immobilized in amber, some just heavily preserved, some stuffed. It's like a cemetery.
She never wore eyeliner, or any makeup at all, really. Most days she wore a ponytail and thick headband, and a single necklace. So simple, but she walked with so much confidence, much more than all the other girls with their masks. There was no mask on her, just honesty, openness, beauty.
When I think of her, the image that comes to mind is a miniature her with a tent and campfire, hanging out in my heart while a miniature me makes a halfhearted attempt at asking her to leave. However, Mini-Me always just ends up sitting on the log next to her making s'mores, totally fine with the fact that my heart's going to go up in flames. I just can't seem to get her out of there...
It stares at me. The little dinosaur wearing a diaper is carefully drawn on the stall door in black permanent marker, its big eyes examining me carefully as I roll out an appropriate amount of toilet paper. The name scrawled under it makes my heart skip a beat; "Kailey."
Someone gave me a bandana from a Lady Gaga concert. It's got her name written on it all over, in red and white. It's on my bed by me, along with the keychain and bag. I love it with all my heart, but.... what in the WORLD am I supposed to do with a bandana? I don't wear bandanas....
Maybe it's the fluorescent lights, or maybe it's her fluorescent smile. It could the the fluorescent pink paint on the small clay pig we made together, or maybe it's just knowing this is it, the last day, it's over. I should be upset, but what's this? Relief? Makes sense; she's too bright. She blinds me.