sammy060218
I am your thoughts
I am your frown
I am the reason
you're in a hospital gown
so listen to my words
for they put you in your place
there is no going back
there are no better days
your bark is far stronger
than your bite will ever be
your smile
far brighter
than your thoughts
or your dreams
your grades
far higher
than your hope
or self-esteem
but what you must realize is
the bark can't scare away
the thoughts that rage
the smile can't fend off
the frowns that invade
the grades can't hide
the disappointment in their eyes
you put your heart on your sleeve
and you stare as it breaks
when they inevitably leave
you try to speak up
but your voice gets lost
you're not important
you're a lost cause
your bark is far stronger
than your bite will ever be
but don't fret
your friends will forget you
and then you'll see
there's nothing left
but you and me
earbuds are my only escape
they are there
when no one else is
earbuds put music into my ears
it vibrates my eardrums
and makes me feel less alone
but i am still alone
there are kids around me
talking
laughing
i have my earbuds
and the music that explains me
better than i can
i have friends
but are they really friends
if they ignore you
are they really friends
if they stop to tell you their problems
but dont stick around long enough
to hear yours
they dont understand
i am only the real me
when i am alone with earbuds
and my voice
or when i am on stage
entertaining people
relating to people who
relate to music
earbuds are my only escape
but maybe one day
there will be someone
who needs an escape
and they find me
and they play my songs
or read my writing
or see me act
and they realize
i am just like them
i need an escape too
because everyone is broken
but some people
found their escape
while others are still searching
there she stood
coated in her own blood
screaming
but not making a sound
there she stood
crying
but not sure why
there she stood
with a blade in her hand
pressed against her wrist
pressed against her vein
there she stood
her arm dripping
coating the ground
in sticky, warm blood
blood
as red as the nail polish on her nails
there she stood
coated in her own blood
wondering
will it ever get better?
I was incapable of breathing as I saw them together. they were laughing and smiling, holding hands.. they leaned over and kissed. but this isn't out of the ordinary unless one of them is your best friend and the other is your boyfriend... I was left broken at my locker as they walked away. I was incapable of stopping them, incapable of looking away.
my mind is vacant of thoughts, as the smoke fills my lungs. my chest is vacant of emotions, as I let the nicotine flow through me. I finally feel peace as I take a long drag from the cigarette clenched between my fingers. my lungs are filled once again as I take the last drag. and the smoke swirls around me before fading away. then the thoughts and the emotions come back and the peace is replaced with anxiety until I can slip away from everyone for my next "therapy session"
the fallen angels weep
as they descend
from their place in heaven
to the depths of hell
for they have sinned
and are no longer welcome
inside the golden gates
of paradise
but what is paradise
when you can't be
who you are truly
meant to be?
they were once gods favorites
now cast aside
Like a kid's broken toy
the funny thing is
they truly are broken toys
they were used
looked up to by humans
praised for being perfect
but is anyone or anything
ever truly perfect?
they weren't
and they were thrown
away
is that what God wants us
to know
if we are not perfect
will we be sent to hell?
is there even a god?
does anyone hear
the prayers
that we all desperately send?
do all of our wishes
fall upon deaf ears?
do all of our dreams
mean a thing
to anyone
but us?
the fallen angels weep
as they realize
they have been played
used
broken
thrown out
and forgotten
the fallen angels weep
and so do we
as we realize
those fallen angels
are really just humans
they are human
and hated
because they are not perfect
they are hated
for the same reason
we hate ourselves
my heart is in a cage with a million chains and locks around it. my heart cannot be reached by just anyone. out of the millions of chains and locks, there is one lock that will open up the whole cage, if only you have the key. and only one person has the key.
misery is a horrible feeling. it's like someone putting 50-pound weights on your chest. it's like someone squeezing all of the air out of your lungs. it's like a million butterflies were released in your stomach and are trying to fly up your throat and out your mouth. misery is a combination of sadness and anger. misery is one of the worst feelings in the world.
put the radius of dat dick in my mouth. show him wat dis mouf do. grapefruit method that bitch. fuckin succ.
I sat on my porch swing, slowly swinging back and forth while looking across the street. I was watching her, but not in a creepy way. she knew I was there and she knew I was a people watcher and I would talk to her when or if I wanted. she was reading a book, How to Kill a Mockingbird. And she was perched in a big oak tree in her front yard. she looked like she could sit there for hours, and she did. and sometimes I would join her.
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writing since 2017 · 22 entries · 21 days shown up
each square is a day—lit means sammy showed up.
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the words sammy reaches for
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