JackieTheWallflower
My teeth are misaligned
so my mother takes me to the orthodontist
an awful middle-aged man
he takes my teeth in his pliers
and pulls and pulls and
pulls
until *poof* they're all gone
every last one
"All done!" he beams
"A perfect smile."
"I've never been religious," I said.
"Well then it's a great time to start. Put your hands on your head and turn around."
As if in a dream, I did as he told and heard a predatory click. Then one more.
Revival of the greatest
Master's glee
Don't get caught in jubilee
Revival of the master
Slave's disgrace
Don't get caught in cool embrace
I build myself an armor of secrets but really it's an armor of tissue paper and with every word you whisper to me parts of it disintegrate
flake off
flutter around and form a vortex of comfort
drawing closer to you
and your sweet nothings pierce the final bit of chain link paper as I melt into you
My deity is my love -
It drives me, begs me to be perfect.
Be selfless, be admiring.
Use me unconditionally,
It says.
Underneath the wretched sun
My evil laces come undone
Caught like houseflies in a net
I pray for when the sun will set.
Angels appear differently for everyone. For me, my angels manifest themselves in the people I love. My family, my friends, my lover. They offer me a holy salvation that traditional angels could never deliver.
Peripheral, that's me
Constantly on the edge
Never the focus
Always the wallflower
People see me
Out of the corners of their eyes
But they don't really see me
Not ever
They see my mistakes
But they don't see me
Constantly in the peripheral
An acrobat in the bedroom. That's all she was.
A body attached to a pair of lips, a blossom attached to a body.
Not a woman, not a human, a pair of dark shadows under eyes.
Losing sight of him, I began to become unhinged
Hanging as if by a single fraying thread
Snip snip SNAP
Suspended in space for a single moment
Before I fall
Farther and farther from his outstretched hands
Clearing vision, and I see he reaches not for me
But for someone else
Someone I used to be
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