jelsamepsey
Walls. We build them to protect ourselves. To hide behind them. To make sure no one sees who we really are.
We are afraid that if the walls fall, then everything will shatter.
Why are we so afraid to show who are we? To let the walls fall down? To be authentic. To be real. To stop hiding behind facades, but to really be the people we really are? Why do we find it easier to be fake? To lie to ourselves, instead of telling the truth and showing the truth?
It destroys. It starts as an addiction in one person, but in the end, it hurts many. In the end, it cannot be controlled, and then the devestation hits full force.
The crowd was gathering in the square. Torches were lit in every corner, and the people in the line solemnly passed them down to each other. It was time to revolt. The people twittered each other the code, and with that, everyone began to destroy the city in hopes that the revolt would help restore the country back to natural order and bring peace back to the country.
I have to take them every day. I swallow them, and they're what keep me living. But they also have me dying. Think about it. Every day, I have to wake up, find the bottle, unlock the bottle, get water, swallow the pill, kill it with water, and then go on with my day. Sleep. Wake up. Repeat the cycle. It sucks. What else am I supposed to do, though? If I miss a day, I die. I wish I could skip a day. But I can't. Why? If I was born half a century ago, it wouldn't matter. Stupid pills.
It’s a knife, and I want to use it. No one can tell me that I can’t. I’m going to use it now. But I still think about my life for a moment before I end it. Do I really want to do this? Do I want to do myself in? Am I ready to leave everything behind?
I never had anything in the first place. I remind myself of this as I lift the knife level with my eyes. Well, then. Time for the merciless act of stabbing myself in the heart.
I really am a little afraid to do this, but might as well. After all, I’ve been wanting to commit suicide almost my whole life.