stormwarrier
Thirst. That dry, scratchy feeling that lays in the back of your mouth. The thing that drives people mad if it isn't quenched. If it isn't squelched. Thirst will drive people to do crazy things. To kill. To pursue a life of something they don't believe in. It's the one thing that connects us to the animal world.
Plans. They never seem to stay the same. They're always changing and shifting like sand underfoot. Never steady and solid. Some are life threatening, others are so light you could blow them away in the wind. Plans are what shapes the world. If not for plans, nothing would be done.
Statement. That's what she made. Loud, proud, and beautiful. She grabbed at your attention and held it in an iron fist. There was no way to escape. You couldn't stop looking at her. No one could. Everyone loved her. Everyone wanted to be her friend. Everyone wanted to show her around when she was new to the school. And that's how she got control of us all....
Bee. Buzz. Zzzzz. Sleep? Sleep. That's where I'm trying to go. I close my eyes, tilt my head against the soft pillow. Take in a long slow breath. Deer. Jump. Hop. Skip. Fall. Falling. Falling? Why am I falling? What's wrong?
It's happening again. The crazy is taking over.
I had always wanted to sweep her off her feet. Show her what a romantic I was. That I was head over heels in love with her. I wanted her to smile at ME. I wanted her to laugh with me. I didn't want to be on the outside anymore. I wanted to be next to her. To hold her. I wanted her to be mine and only mine forever.
Examples. What are the worth? Just to show you how to perfectly do something? Well, let me tell you, I'm not perfect. Perfection is an example of something I'm not. There.
Why is perfection so hard to reach?
Why do people have examples of EVERYTHING?!
What's the point in an example?
Are you really stupid enough to need an example of something that is so obvious a "caveman could do it?"
Control. Power. It's what I strive for. What I wanted. What I NEEDED. Control keeps people in line. Keeps them under me. Keeps them following me. Control. I needed it. I needed to feel like I had them in my grasps, like I had them forever and I could never let them go. I needed to be on the top.
writing since 2011 · 7 entries · 7 days shown up
each square is a day—lit means Alexandra showed up.
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the words Alexandra reaches for
controlexamplefallingplansforeverexamplesperfectionheadsleepcrazythirstpowerstrivelinefollowinggrasps