angelduciel
You wear a badge
But it is blank
You don't know what you stand for
So you fall for everything
Including me,
The one who smiles
and laughs
even though I'm storming
and panicking
diconnected
wondering
hoping you feel the same
wonder where this will go
You wear a badge of my name
You pin it in your skin
And leave the trail of blood out the door.
I cannot win
It is torture to look at the person you love every day and realize they don't feel the same way about you.
It's torture to touch someone who's empty and hollow.
It's torture to be suffocating the only thing that allows you to breathe.
In a kingdom by the sea
we used to Be
Him and me
Now the body of water only flows
from my eyes
down my nose
My body’s way of
trying to reunite with
the sea
And what my eyes
Used to see
No longer
are we hand in hand
lip to lip
in the sand
and what i no longer
have to be
In a kingdom by the sea
we used to Be
Him and me
Now the body of water flows
from my eyes
down my nose
My body's way of
trying to reunite with
the sea
You changed
I don't know you anymore
And I don't care to know who you've become.
-Soundtrack of our live-
Dreams have long passed
And I wonder if you dream of me too.
In the mist, we talk like we used to.
Bold words - underlined
But still a secret. Our own world
That spins back into us.. Tangling us together.
And we listened, to the soundtracks of your life,
Of our short lives together. Taking in every breath
And every moment. Living in it,
In a golden carriage covered in pain, we found
Our sanctuary.
Laughing like we were children
Running in the sun, uncaring of who sees.
Capturing the moment, with smiles and shutters.
Those were the melodies of our soundtrack,
Finding refuge in each other,
A comfort, no other heart could burn.
And like a bird, you called to me.
And listened to me sing back our song
And let me fly, from your palm, above anything else, any care in the world.
Until I melted and cried tears of joy.
Now, with tears I write, that this birdie is gone
And sing the song of goodbyes.
I let you go, so you can be alive
Because now, all my songs cut you deep.
And our memories burn you, and silence any song
That we ever sang together.
Our soundtrack has faded into silence.
And I fly above you now, too high for you to see. For you to hear me cry.
And I await for a life, in which we are both birds. Crying the tears only a Sparrow can weave. Until you can fly with me, and we can sing again.
I imagine lines in a tree stump.
Lines drawn to those lines
One line drawn to the first circle- This is my rebirth. This is me holding my mother's hand crossing the parking lot. This is snacks in the afternoon, after school has exhausted me. This is sandwiches after swimming in the pool
Lines drawn to the fifth, this is my realization that nothing is how I want it to be. This is me growing awkward with everything around me, nothing feels right to the touch.
This line describes my blood and tears and worry and hate and anger. At this point the lines are scribbles, as if carved by a shaky hand.
This is the eighth, this is regrets and hopelessness. It's abandonment and crushed hopes.
And this line here, the one just made, is where I realize that there's no point in anything I try. This is me feeling distant from myself and the world. This is me knowing after this month I will have no goals in my life. Nothing to look forward to.
The lines coming up will be out of shape and will no longer resemble a line and will be unbearable to watch. It will be hard to follow and read.
The last line is too blurry. It resembles the edges of pages in a book that come to a close and you know that next time you read it, it will never be the same.
Such is my timeline.
Are there even real pleasures in life?
Life moves on whether you're happy or not.
Carving its numbers and letters into your face with a careless notion.
And as time progresses, every little edge gets darker, and darker,making up for the lost memories from the days when you were younger.
Life means nothing when you cannot remember anything.
Smiles never happened if you don't remember you took the effort to make them.
The same with tears and friends and lovers.
Time erodes the faces of man like cliffs and the seas
Sweeping back and forth, back and forth in what seems
Like a crawling, sweeping, etching motion; Craddling and whispering "Remember when?"
Are there even real sorrows in life?
Life moves on whether you're patheticly drowning or not, Just living day by day
from one pleasure, or sorrow to another.
And the words spoken and actioned played,
stay all until your next move.
But when you move on, the smiles, the laughs...
They mean nothing when life moves on this quickly.
Haiku:
I think we should run
Away; Past the lights and Sounds
We must not look back.
I'm glad I get to experience every day with him.
Every second is a new life for me.
I'm glad the light is being brought back in to my life.
I feel like I'm falling alive.
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writing since 2012 · 75 entries · 58 days shown up
each square is a day—lit means AngelDuCiel showed up.
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the words AngelDuCiel reaches for
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