gothickitten
I had an epiphany today. I thought about it as you ran away. I'd hate to tell you to stay. So just run, run away.
Passionate. Infinite. The two collide. For when there is passion it rarely lasts.
They say they have a "connection with god". They say I'm missing out but all I see is freedom for me and imprisonment for them. So, I think I'll take my detached life joyfully.
My plans. They're so clear. Graduate. Go to college. Get married. I even know what college and who will be my husband. But..... They're not my plans. They're a prediction. I'd rather step in front of a speeding- but I'm not going to. Right...?
It's a card game to you. Just a stack of cards. Oh, please, take me seriously. Because I am serious that I love you. Love is not just a card game.
In this lonely place I feel there is something missing. Dark, damp, desperate. I see a flare in the distance. I walk towards the sudden burst of light and there, your face appears and I'm no longer in hell.
No.
No.
No.
I don't want to be reminded of the warmth I can't have.
I don't want you to tell me of the warmth, the tender warmth! Why is it not here?
That certain phrase in culture, the one that makes the flowers bloom and the butterflies return to your stomach. What makes those three words so important? Who decided that the concept of "love" would even exist? Maybe I think too much about these things as I sit, allowing Jack White to turn me into complacent putty with his voice. But how can I be human without asking questions and wondering the most important thing of all; why.
I could reject this little one. Even though I didn't feel I was ready for it. Maybe it's selfish but I loved this small being with all of my heart and I wanted to cherish and coddle and take care of it, no matter the consequences.
A simple feathered boa, pink with blue mixed in. I saw you standing there, I knew I'd never win. Muscled shoulders, abs of steal, yet there you were, with beads held high. I thought we had a future, but it was all a game. You love another man, but I love you all the same.
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writing since 2010 · 92 entries · 82 days shown up
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