gothickitten

gothickitten

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I had an epiphany today. I thought about it as you ran away. I'd hate to tell you to stay. So just run, run away.

Passionate. Infinite. The two collide. For when there is passion it rarely lasts.

They say they have a "connection with god". They say I'm missing out but all I see is freedom for me and imprisonment for them. So, I think I'll take my detached life joyfully.

plans

My plans. They're so clear. Graduate. Go to college. Get married. I even know what college and who will be my husband. But..... They're not my plans. They're a prediction. I'd rather step in front of a speeding- but I'm not going to. Right...?

cards

It's a card game to you. Just a stack of cards. Oh, please, take me seriously. Because I am serious that I love you. Love is not just a card game.

flare

In this lonely place I feel there is something missing. Dark, damp, desperate. I see a flare in the distance. I walk towards the sudden burst of light and there, your face appears and I'm no longer in hell.

No. No. No. I don't want to be reminded of the warmth I can't have. I don't want you to tell me of the warmth, the tender warmth! Why is it not here?

That certain phrase in culture, the one that makes the flowers bloom and the butterflies return to your stomach. What makes those three words so important? Who decided that the concept of "love" would even exist? Maybe I think too much about these things as I sit, allowing Jack White to turn me into complacent putty with his voice. But how can I be human without asking questions and wondering the most important thing of all; why.

I could reject this little one. Even though I didn't feel I was ready for it. Maybe it's selfish but I loved this small being with all of my heart and I wanted to cherish and coddle and take care of it, no matter the consequences.

boa

A simple feathered boa, pink with blue mixed in. I saw you standing there, I knew I'd never win. Muscled shoulders, abs of steal, yet there you were, with beads held high. I thought we had a future, but it was all a game. You love another man, but I love you all the same.

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writing since 2010 · 92 entries · 82 days shown up

each square is a day—lit means Moira showed up.

6longest streak

82days written

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on this day 16 years ago

Moira wrote about overhead
“I was submurged in water. It was all around me. I couldn't breathe, I could hardly think. I was panicking in the deep grey liquid I was trying to escape. Overhead there was light and I knew there was…”

the words Moira reaches for

loveheartlostnowlovedbeautifuleyessometimessoulgiftlongerfaceeternalheartreesrun