naivenan
i fiddle
with my fingers
while i watch you
breathe
it's been so long
it's been so little.
why is my heart
racing to jump
out of my body?
i never thought
we'd made it
this far
i always hoped
you'd stay here
after the dark
i see the water
flow from afar;
dancing,
waltzing,
swaying
with my pulse.
we were birthed
by it
pushed into land
wishing each day
to be returned
back to salt.
ithe bluest lagoon
to ever exist
twinkled
with sun glitter
and reflected
in your eyes.
to be here,
skin to skin,
saying yes
to us
until
we die
was the
dream
my heart
dreamt
and my eyes
longed to
descry.
i wait for you by the hillside,
leaning on grass and dandelion dust.
you take pictures of clouds
and flowers, and i ponder:
how can the little things
be so bright for your soul?
i burrowed deep into the duvet cover
and said, "at last".
i spend all day
running through tunnels
and
skipping over
potholes,
counting the seconds
to make it home
to the heat
of your arms.
the snow flurry
melted on the tip of my nose
it's january again
and i don't feel whole
there's a restlessness
intertwined in my ribs
trying to break them,
cursing someone's name.
who's hex am i here to break?
which was the life where i broke hell lose?
because in this one i've just picked myself up
and scrubed to erase the blue.
savor will take me back
to my favorite places:
to my grandma's danish dining table,
then passed to my mom,
to a cold winter vacation
and a summer song
to the boy who broke my heart
and how i can't buy peppermint gum
to the girl who saved my heart
and our raw fish amour fou.
the bridle stuck to my face
carving my features,
changing my face.
it tightens with each thought
and turns it into prayer,
incesant and humming,
broken and rare.
i became what i ran from
i took a leap of faith
and held you close.
too many years of weak arms
and wobbly legs,
too many hours wasted
without your warmth or taste
too many dreams of you
and our blue duvet cover.
i wouldn’t forgive myself
If I threw good love in the trash
for someone’s mother.
i feel a knot in my stomach
weaved down from my brain
into my throat,
strangling my thoughts,
burning my words with its threads
into ashes.
it's restrained the memory of me,
they took her hostage,
she's gone on a hunger strike.
and as the fire within me ignites
and scorches the ropes,
the burnt jute builds up
and i'm choking.
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writing since 2014 · 52 entries · 51 days shown up
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