rnaejc

rnaejc

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I don't know if I have ever had anything stolen from me. Come to think of it, one of my pipes has been MIA for a while and I am suspicious of that. But at any rate, I do feel like I had parts of my youth stolen. People have stolen small bits of my soul away from me.

This morning has felt eventful for me. My motivation to get up and work has been at an all-time low because of different scheduling conflicts, and then I receive an email of yet another cancellation. I don't know if that's considered eventful, but I feel like I haven't been given a break of having a real schedule and being able to get real work done. It's been all about rescheduling work that will eventually get canceled. Lame.

You can't explain your situation to someone and have them 100% understand. Just like you will never understand someone's perspective unless you knew everything that goes behind their decision-making processes. Sometimes, we can have similar ideals or opinions with people, and that's great. But sometimes it takes getting out of your comfort zone to really gain some new perspective and learn.

bow

I gotta wear this bow in my hair. It makes me look proper and that's what everyone expects of me. Properness. To be polite and listen intently on what everyone says. And smile and nod and agree with every word. It's a tough position to be in to hold back your opinion, and shut up and take it.

mean

Mean has many different meanings (haha). It could be like rude, cruel, etc. Could be the average of a group of numbers. It could be the definition of something. So weird how one word could be interpreted in many different ways.

crane

Crane in the yard. Picking up dirt and moving it elsewhere. Clearing out, to build something new. The yard was fine as it was. It doesn't need anything there. We build, build, and build in this country. A piece of empty space is never appreciated anymore.

braid

I braid my hair to pull it away from my face. To help keep it in the style I want it to be in. It's the proper way of being lazy for a girl. Hell, I must be quite lazy then. I braid my hair quite often. And I don't give a fuck. Guys dont care anyway. Small details.

If you could predict the future, that'd be boring. There would be no suspense to life. You'd know your whole course of life, when you're gonna die, who you will marry, etc. I like the mystery. I don't wanna know what happens tomorrow. I will find out when I get there. Fuck predictions. I will find out the hard way.

I use eyeliner before I leave my house. Almost to cover up the lack of sleep I always have. It lets me hide from the reality that I stay up all night just thinking what ifs and whys and what did I do wrong. It lets me hide from the world what's really going on.

At bonnaroo. Wear them to keep the sweat off the face. Look kinda bad ass at the same time. Need to be there now. Need the heat and freedom.

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writing since 2010 · 28 entries · 28 days shown up

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on this day 11 years ago

Christie wrote about perspective
“You can't explain your situation to someone and have them 100% understand. Just like you will never understand someone's perspective unless you knew everything that goes behind their decision-making…”

the words Christie reaches for

etcanywaybettersometimespuzzledbuildchocolatenowbrainbuzzhairdifferentwordworkrealstolen