blithechick
if i could rewrite life, i would.
not all of it.
just parts
like tivo.
although really redo. rewrite. scratch out and start over.
like this morning.
freaking out at work.
REWRITE that
i'd be so grateful.
when she placed her hand on the railing, she knew it was the last choice she'd make. she grabbed a hold and threw her feet over. her body sailed over the bars and fell. falling. falling. falling. until she fell no more.
leaves of memories and thoughts. a hundred and two little things floating in my brain. feathers of the past. they itch and caress.
they used to call it icing. you know, in hockey, when you go past two lines without touching the puck?
at least i think that's what it was called. maybe it still is.
so much has changed. i used to watch the rangers play in new york. their practices were so cool. we'd get autographs and take pictures. a 15 year old girl's dream to hang out with cute older boys. fun!
the first thing that came to mind is so cheesy: life doesn't come with instructions.
no
it
does
not
but i want to say something more profound.
i don't like to read instructions. i like to figure it out on my own. if i can't, then it just doesn't seem worth it. instructions are for weenies.
and yet, they do come in handy every now and then. (lamest writing ever)
i look at lots of do it yourself decorations and think, "hey, i can do that." and yet i never do.
my house is not decorated. it's a hodge podge of stuff. but there are no decorations. not really.
and yet, i love my house. it may look bare to some, but it's mine. and it's a home for my family.
she said she had some advice to give. it was just a "suggestion." but i knew what that really meant. it meant she was going to tell me what she thought i should do. again. just once i'd like to figure it out on my own without her "suggestions." i mean, come on. i'm almost 25, i can so this on my own.
so i listened. sort of nicely. sort of quietly. and prayed she'd hurry up and be done.
the turbine stopped working. no wind had blown in days. hunger would set in soon. the turbine ran everything in their small, remote village. with no wind, there was no turbine. and that meant no food, no water, nothing.
third period was math. fourth was geography. fifth was science. i hated science. unless we got to do the cool chemistry experiments. i was all over that. we'd bubble and brew and catch things on fire. that's my kind of science.
the old computer modem buzzed and beeped through the phone line. we couldn't believe we found one that worked. since wireless had gone down, we had to figure something out. it was the only way to find the information we were looking for. so we waited until it went through. and waited and waited. at least, the page loaded. it was just what we needed. the piece we'd been missing. we breathed a sigh of relief.
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