eremin
He crouches until your eyes are level, your violet irises gazing hesitantly but determinedly into his own empty, void-black ones. His eyes show nothing, show his lack of empathy, lack of anything that has to do with people like you. He never really did care, and you never did, either.
"You needed me," he hisses.
"I don't need anything from you," you reply, spitting into his face and rising to your feet. You don't need anything from anyone. You are strong. You are a universe. You are stardust.
Zir movements were slow, breathing labored, feet dragging. Ze didn't think zir head was actually functioning, or at least, it wouldn't be for much longer. Whatever that syringe contained must have been the cause. It couldn't be anything else, ze thought, falling to zir knees. Ze didn't get to say goodbye to zir family, nor zir friends. Was this life worth it at all, really, with an end like this?
"What do you think ze's dreaming about?" a nurse murmured, gazing down at the comatose patient with soft, thoughtful eyes.
My great grandfather wrote in his book that those with upside-down v's as their m and n handwriting curves while writing cursive show that you are an analytical thinker. If they are round, you are a builder thinker. If they're more like v's than anything, you are an intuitive thinker. Handwriting shows a lot about one's mind, really, and are all based on unarguable logic.
MR KRABS IS UNFAIR
MR KRABS IS IN THERE
STANDING AT THE CONCESSION
PLOTTING HIS OPPRESSION
ok for real tho
you have shown him too much mercy. throw him away already. you need no man, no misogynist like that to make you feel as inferior as he does. he is well past three strikes. so send him out. better yet, kill him. men are trash, so you will see soon enough.
our love is a tower that
has been built upon
sand and gravel and ice
it shakes and quivers and
can't handle much wind but
through all its storms
and all its breezes
it has yet to
collapse
and if we keep going
the way we do
sand will become stone and
it will forever hold
strong
You realize, suddenly, that you have not done enough. But that's okay, you decide. That's fine. Because there are other people here, other people with you, and they will help. They will always help. When you thought they'd left they remained, when you thought they'd betrayed you they only showed faith, and this is why you smile as you hold your friend's hand and thank them, thank them, thank them, and go still.
Ze doesn't take the time to think about it. Thinking will ruin zim, and ze knows it. Ze can't, not now, not ever. It's vital ze doesn't, because if ze does it'll leave zir
wondering
wondering
wondering
and ze will never fall asleep thoughtlessly again.
is your name a
prayer, or a
promise? i can
never really tell
the difference.
but oh god, i'll
never leave you
as long as these
syllables taste
so heavenly on my
tongue.
now, i don't
think it matters.
When one thinks of 'veteran's they think of war. They think of old, wrinkled men in old uniforms speaking of old battles. I am not a war veteran. I am a veteran of my own mind. I have conquered my own battles, ones with myself, warred with my very mind. I have tried and tried again to force myself into happiness, but that isn't necessary, not anymore.
I've won.
Shh. Keep it quiet. Keep it low. Whisper, barely breathe, do not move. You can not move. They will hear you. Repress your thoughts, your movements, your sounds. You must be silent, silent, silent or they will find you. They will catch you. You don't know what they'll do but you must repress it, shh, quiet now. Oh god, oh god, fuck, don't sneeze, please God don't sneeze oh God what have you done--
writing since 2014 · 10 entries · 10 days shown up
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zirgodsilentnowmindwonderingthankthinkereyesshhquietrepressmovementssneezedonewar