sadgirl-lapis
I think he ought to be made to fall to his knees, in front of a crowd of hecklers like he sees every Friday. He has hurt so many people, just bring him down, someone, please. I can't stop crying when I see his face everywhere. I hate that it's okay to hate women the way he does, that it's funny, but if I say I hate men like him, I'm a crazy bitch. I'm not the one who categorically wants women to die violently.
I want to smile. I want to frown. I want to bare my teeth for you without being afraid. I want to spend money. I want to glisten. I don't want to be ashamed anymore, but I can't afford not to be. i don't know how the other girls smile full-heartedly without this fear, when everyone can see their pearly whites are pearly beige. I don't know. I just know that I don't deserve to smile.
It started with something small. The clip on her pen breaking under her fingers. Getting cut off in traffic. By lunch, when she saw her face in the mirror, she was too disgusted by herself to make eye contact. When she finally got off work, the whole world felt like it was turned against her, or that she has profoundly failed it somehow.
I felt small beneath her, her looming shadow hanging over me. Her arms were strong like tree branches. I gulped pathetically. But her touch was gentle. Calloused fingertips against my cheek, tenderly caressing the fear off my visage. I loved her.
I showed her my cock. My big, thick cock. Hers wasn't attached to her body but it was bigger, much bigger. She'd fucked more men AND women than I had. I wanted to suck it; i wanted to gain all the essence from it, so that my cock, my shitty bio cock could be bigger and more powerful. I felt so impotent. I love her. I want a cock like hers... I want to know if anyone else wants to ride me like they do her.
we were an odd bunch, just like sundance's were called the wild bunch, their hole in the wall gang. We were more like the hole-in-the-socks gang. Mismatched, unattached outfit we were. Still, we were never caught for all our heists back in the day. We couldn't keep a set of horses if we tried.
writing since 2016 · 7 entries · 7 days shown up
each square is a day—lit means lapis showed up.
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the words lapis reaches for
cockbiggersmilehatewatchedbunchholegangagainstfearfacepearlyundresspileclothesforming