amieeb
Immediately I separate this into two words:
A dark room
Late at night, window shielded from street lights
And there's nothing bright that can creep into this
Space that is both full and empty
It seems endless this time spent this looping reality where nothing really changes despite the back and forth it's always the same thing the feeling of hopelessness always returns in between the brief periods of feeling wonderful.
It wasn't a whim that took me across the country. It was a deep-seated feeling that had been denied but still grew. A long time coming and I finally took the chance. I took a chance on you.
Of paint spilled across the floor Jackson Pollock style Are they beautiful or is it a happy accident or merely a coincidence There is a distinct lack of direction my like that of my life I don't know where it's going or what the meaning is behind this patternless pigment
Someone noticed that I'm
Not okay
She called me out
And I admitted the
Truth but the next
Steps might be the hardest
To take
You've tarnished my feelings for you
Clouded them with your inconsiderate inconsistencies
My logic kicked and and told my heart you're not good
Despite everything I've felt and we've been through you've
Managed to create this desperate situation where we will always lose.
Do I consider myself lucky to know you to have met you and after all these years fallen in love with you? Is it luck or irony that has created this dynamic? It's been said that I should feel grateful that I at least have angst and yearning while others' hearts remain desolate.
Nothing is obvious since you
Can't seem to make up your mind
Or stick to a decision despite
How obvious I have been about
My feelings for you so
I suppose it's more than
Obvious that you were never
Ready for anything and it
Won't be clear till I'm obviously
Gone
If I could alter the
Past I think that I would
Change something to recreate
Our future despite knowing
What a dangerous game that
Is only so desperately wish that
Our lives were more intertwined-
At the very least I would
Create a life in which
You were not always on
My mind
Paperclips are a part of my daily life
So much so that you can find them all around my
Living room, blending into the carpet
I fill my pockets with multiple sizes and feel
Distraught when I forget since
They come in so handy for
Organization
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