walli13
I have lived such a short time compared to others. Seventeen years is nothing. And yet I've already become so fatigued and tired of living...that it's almost inexcusable. almost unforgivable. I'll hopefully look back on these days and laugh, and be able to see how much of a fool I was...but until then, I will just have to figure out how to not worry.
Society: a world full of "civilized" and judgmental people, who think they have the right to criticize others.
But saying that makes me just like them doesn't it?
they carried the stretcher out of the house for what felt like hours to the on lookers. Over the light beige cobbled stone, past the sidewalk, onto the street and into the bright red screeching ambulance. It was the last time any of them ever saw her.
I try not to dwell on the past, because watching those memories play over and over in my mind only hurts. It makes me sad to know that it was all so good then, but now I'm stuck with no exit. but I know that when this all passes, I won't dwell on it.
I had to wait a minute to get a hold of my feelings. I had to stop and think. To reign in what I was feeling. To keep it all from just pouring out onto the sidewalk around me. And I just barely managed to. That minute was just barely enough.
I try to never let them pour when anyone else is around. No matter how much it makes me feel sick. Nauseous. I wont let those tears pour.
the mayor of the city, doesn't always have all the power
sometimes he's just a face to an organization that controls everything behind the strings. Sometimes he truly gets what he wants.
But almost always, does he not meet the needs of every person in his city. and with values that are polar opposites.. that's impossible.
i always wished i had someone there to just chat with. like talk about nothing until the sun came up. Someone who was comfortable just completely being themselves with me. I've never been able to find that person. I thought i had...but then they left me behind. They chose to ignore what my friendship meant to both of us. and that hurt you know...it really did
for the duration of the time I was there. I didn't know what to do. I wandered about the rooms, trying to catch sight of someone I knew, but there was nothing. No one. I couldn't stop and meet new people. I wasn't good with new people. So I did the only thing i could do. I got drunk.
The art gallery down the street remains the last building left untouched. Everything else is gone. The parks, the trees, the stone walls and fences surrounding the homes and apartments. it's all gone.
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writing since 2012 · 17 entries · 16 days shown up
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the words Walli reaches for
sometimesbehindpastableplaytireddoorhousewindcarebelievedsacredthemselvesstreetstonestop